Talk to your children about sex, Mama Nyongo urges parents

VETERAN musician and marriage counselor Mary Miti popularly known as Mama Nyongo says parents should not feel shy to talk about sexual and reproductive health with their children at an early age.

Ms Miti has also advised parents to give accurate answers when quizzed by their children on where babies come from as opposed to lying that they are bought from shops or picked from the river.

Speaking in an interview recently, Ms Miti said children first need to be told the correct names of their private parts and how they are not to be shown to anyone.

She said that way, it will lessen the chances of children being defiled, raped or taken advantage of by anyone.

“Immediately they start talking, they should know the right names of the vagina and penis, not names like doyo and they should be told that a private part is not to be shown or touched by any one because it is a private part. As they grow older, they can also be told the disadvantages of showing their private parts and people touching them as some people are wicked and can end up raping or defiling them,” she said.

She said when the topic is introduced early to them, children will be able to distinguish between appropriate touch by specialists such as doctors and inappropriate touch by anyone.

Ms Miti said discussing sexual reproductive health with children allows them to open up and be free enough to tell their parents in case anything inappropriate was to happen to them.

She said parents should not wait for a child to be 16 before introducing them to sexual reproductive health education.

“Children are going to hear about sex from elsewhere. By getting in first as a parent, you are making sure that they receive the right information and more importantly, that they know how you feel about it. That way, a parent is influencing their child on what they will one day do about sex. Children that receive good sex education are more likely to delay having sex and when they start, they are more likely to avoid unwanted pregnancies, and sexually transmitted illnesses,” she said.

She said parents should not pretend or think their children are too young for sexual and reproductive health education,

She said if they are not told early enough, children may easily access the information from what they see, watch and hear and lead them to trying it to satisfy their curiosity.

“I know some children may be stubborn even when preached to, but as parents, we shouldn't give up. The little ones should be taught on what we call safe touch and unsafe touch. Let them be aware of a bad touch because some people may not be raping them but molesting them, let's make our children our best friends so that even when they are threatened, they know they can still count on us as parents,” she said.

She said sexual education should involve small, frequent and repetitive conversations with their children.